I very rarely use office applications but I quite like Libre Office. It works well when people send me stupid office documents that I don't care about. If I actually want to write something in formatted text or make a spreadsheet (even rarer) then I just use Abiword and Gnumeric respectively.
I suppose you could try Google Docs though. Lots of people seem to like that and it supports open formats which I know are important to you.
It's true that open formats give me a boner. But this is precisely why MSO so enhances my productivity, as I'm far less likely to be playing with myself when I should be working.
Excel 2013 on Windows does the attached. Definitely easier than 2011 but also so radically different it took me about 2 minutes to find the error bar options.
You seem to be saying you hate MSOffice 2010 and, by extension 2013 unless it happens to fix some silly something or other, which you pessimistically believe it hasn't. I can only agree that MSOffice in its current state is a horrible, bloated, and nearly unusable mess. By all means buy it. You won't be disappointed.
I don't hate MSO 2010 so much as some aspects of it. And if those apsects have been fixed in 2013 (as suggested by changes in 2011 compared to 2010), then I could live with it.
Other than that, you're almost completely not very far from the mark. Or at least the postal district in which the mark is located.