COMPUTER WORLD has named its top ten computer skills which are fast dying out.

The top ten are Cobol, non=relational DBMS, non-IP networks, cc:Mail, ColdFusion, C programming, Power Builder, Certified Netware Engineers, PC network administrators, and OS/2.

Computer World said that with the move to consolidate Windows servers, some see substantially less demand for PC network administrators.

Cold Fusion was hugely popular in the mid-1990s as the Web programming language of the future. It was killed off by Vole's Active Server Pages and .Net, as well as Java, Ruby on Rails, Python, PHP and other open-source languages.

Although, and this should be telling to you, she probably does not know that ColdFusion 8 is due out this year. Why? Because we are conducting press briefings now, and are talking to all sorts of publications and media. ComputerWorld, however, has refused our invitations! It seems that they'd rather spew sensationalism then actually invest time into researching stories.

Mr. Bunny's Guide to ActiveX begins with the basic building block of all computer software- the pixel. From here it digresses into a classic fantasy adventure story about a cute little talking bunny and a hapless everyman farmer/programmer on an amazing journey to the heart of component-based software. You will actually learn ActiveX by reading out loud to your children at bedtime!

There is simply no better way to learn Java than to have the pineal gland of an expert Java programmer surgically implanted in your brain. Sadly, most HMOs refuse to pay for this career saving procedure, deeming Java to be too experimental. At last there is an alternative treatment for those of us who cannot wait for sweeping health care reforms.

Mr. Bunnys Big Cup O Java is recommended by n out of ten doctors, where n is any integer you wish to make up to impress an astoundingly gullible public. The book begins with an overview of the book, and quickly expands into the book itself. Just look at the topics covered: *Mr. Bunnys rucksack *Farmer Jakes overalls *Java In short, MBBCOJ will teach you all you need to know for a successful career in todays rabbit development environments. "I sincerely hope this book increases the donor pool." --CE3

The Mr. Bunny series is supported, endorsed, and authored by Carlton Egremont III, Esquire, recluse, and all-around weirdo. It is the official place to go when you simply must go someplace official. The books in this series provide no information whatsoever.