Mysterious death? Perhaps not!

From: 99% of gargoyles look like (MR_BASTARD) 1 Jun 2015 08:50
To: ALL1 of 2

The body of a woman aged between 70 and 90 was found at Tokyo's main rail station. The body had been left in a suitcase in a station locker for a month. Tokyo police are investigating the cause of death and examining camera footage to see who left the suitcase.

I think I can help here. It is quite obviously not suspicious and she did it all by herself. After all, if Gareth Williams was able to kill himself inside a padlocked sports holdall, it surely would not be beyond the ability of a small, old Japanese lady to get her body inside a suitcase and inside a locker. They're inscrutable, you know.

From: fixrman 2 Jun 2015 01:44
To: 99% of gargoyles look like (MR_BASTARD) 2 of 2
A dead cert, bastard. Nobody fools you.