Sorry to hear that mate. Getting news like that is horrible, we also had an anomaly in the scan with our new one that is still waiting to be checked out. The waiting is the worst.
I have no offers of advice other than carry on life as normal.

Massive Hug to you both.

The other side of things is, doctors are sometimes wrong. There is a baby named Hope at CHOP and she was expected to live for three hours at most after birth. She is now nearly a month old and may soon be breathing on her own.

Yeah, these have been a long few days.

Still, the scan is tomorrow, and whilst we won't get answers immediately, it won't be too long.

Hope everything checks out OK with yours. I think even if all the tests and scans are clear, I don't think I'll be able to breath until birth day. Mind you, I remember being like that with our first and that pregnancy was plain sailing so that just might be a 'Dad' thing.

Good Luck with the scans, We finally got the answer we needed and I am happy to say the new baby is fine and home with the family.

Have another hug, being a dad is hard when you know you have no control over anything!

Hope all turns out ok. It's bad enough right at the start when the baby to be is only 6mm long and there are worries.

And good news Wattsy :)

Great to hear your news was good.

Our results come back and not so good. Decisions have been made.

Wish I hadn't seen the scans.

Whatever the decision you have to be safe in the knowledge that it was informed with the right info and hopefully right support from medical people, the best decision for everyone involved.

I'm really sorry to hear that JOE :(

Rubbish mate. I am sorry you have to make those sort of decisions, that must be awful. Me and my wife have had a few conversations about what we would do if that situation arose and we were both on the same wave length. I hope you two can talk it through and make a decision soon, don't leave it hanging, it won't help you are the baby.

 

Sorry. Is it entirely hopeless then?
  That's a tough one for sure.

Sorry to hear that :( 

:( big manly hugs, whatever you decide and whatever happens I honestly hope it's for the better.

Sorry ((((Joe and family)))) x

What's done is done...well, this time last week actually.

Long story short, the foetus had Downs. In some ways, the decision would have been easier had the foetus had Edward's or Patau syndrome as they essentially make the foetus unviable and the decision is made for you.

Downs is a much trickier decision. Essentially, I thought Downs was slight to severe mental disability along with the slight physical deformities that are signature to Downs. Turns out after reading (fucking loads) that all that is just the tip of the iceberg, and amongst many other reasons, we're older parents and didn't feel we had the right to sign up our perfectly healthy daughter to look after a disabled sibling after we pop our clogs.

I know other people might have different views on this stuff, and frankly, it's been a week I still have trouble with the decision we made even though I know it was the 'right' one for us and our family, but it still sucks and I can't get the 'heart beating on the scan' memories out of my head for more than a couple of minutes at a time. Shit, at 12 weeks they look fully fucking formed on the screen.

Anyway, I need to draw a line and venting does make me feel a bit better. What's done is done. Move on, move on.

(hug)

Vent away.

In my completely unqualified opinion this is more than enough of a reason.

Not that this makes things easier, but I agree with Ant. I think we would've made the same decision*.

Sorry all the same :(

* Fiona and I, not Ant and I.

Horrible decision to have to make. :(

Sorry to hear about this - hugs!

I cannot begin to imagine having to make a decision as you did; there are too many variables.

I may have mentioned in this forum at one time or another that my daughter has epilepsy, medically intractable. She is on a lot of medication that has many effects on her as the epilepsy itself does. By all appearances she seems "normal" to everyone, but that changes quickly if they happen to view one of her seizures.

During school, the kids were not particularly kind to her, especially [some of] her "friends". There was one girl up our street who Sarah was friendly with, being her first friend when they moved to our neighbourhood. Dayna and Sarah played a lot together early on, but when Sarah was diagnosed with E at 11, things started to change as did the circle of friends. Dayna became "popular" and spent less time with Sarah, especially after Sarah began having the seizures. This was mostly due to other friend's influences.

Unfortunately, Dayna was discovered to have desmoplastic small round "blue cell" tumour cancer (DSRCT) at age 15, an unusual and agressive form of cancer that usually only affects boys (5-1). Sarah loved Dayna; I know this because she still sleeps with a plush moose toy that they bought together early on. She cherishes a few things that Dayna's mom gave her after Dayna died, a mere 8 months after diagnosis. Unfortunately because the other girls were mostly around, Sarah was not comfortable being with them, so Dayna missed out on support from a person who could have helped a lot.

I shudder to think of what Dayna's parents - or I - might have decided to do were we given a choice during pregnancy. I am not sure which heartache would be worse.

Blessings and peace to you.