A 'like' on Facebook is similar to going to the local chip shop and waving to a friend passing by on the other side of the road while you wait for the young lady serving you to finish with your saveloy.

Oh God don't wave, what if they don't recognise you?!

One's arm will have had a tiny warm-up for the fast approaching activity of chip consumption.

I use F.B.Purity to make it all behave a bit more like I want it to.

http://www.fbpurity.com/