1. I don't twat. I have not violently hit someone for years and don't ever intend to do so again.

2. The phrase "do one" without any more detailed context still doesn't make any sense. Try again.

3. I can't see reception from here, not to mention that you'd have to be invited in, since there's a key-code on the door. Not to mention that your definition of "soon" is clearly a bit loose. The best you could do would be to hop on a plane right now and maybe be here just after I've left work. As it is, I doubt you would even have the cash to buy a plane ticket, nor would you know where to buy the ticket to and, if you got here your inability to speak even coherent English, let alone any French would render you utterly incapable of finding your way out of the airport, let alone all the way to my building. Good luck. Don't forget to bring some warm clothes, it can get a mite chilly here in winter, especially if you don't have a home to enter to keep the wind off.

4. I shall only be looking one way when I leave tonight, since it's a one-way street outside my building.

You're a geek, but without talent. All the affectations, simply no knowledge.

Since when?