Credit discredited. I like that.

By 2010, 3/4 of the population will be ravaged by incurable disease and will die...

Someone on the internet says it so it must be true.

2011 sees us visited by either a huge comet or a great earthquake (or both)

and, of course, 2012 is the year the poles will switch and everything will grind to a halt (or not)

In 2013, I will buy myself an Aston Martin. Possibly.

2014 will see England finally win the World Cup but no one else participates on account that they're too busy fighting wars against terror.

 

Against each other.

2015: Saif graduates ;)

HRH Queen Elizabeth II dies. Charles accedes to the throne but the reading of Her Late Majesty's will reveals that she has bequeathed the country to her favourite corgi. Charles declares independence for the Duchy of Cornwall, and rules as Grand Duke on the wave of popularity among the cornish which the move generates.

The rest of Britain is ruled by first Liberal Democrat PM Lembit Opik, with a genetic clone of Princess Diana as co-regent.

<becomes president>

<of everything>

<assassinates president of everything>

<Earth is renamed Andy Black in memorial>

Andy Black is destroyed by a pole-reversing meteorite which hits Yellowstone, causing it to erupt and melt the icecaps, but even that fails to stop the nanobots. A few thousand of the planet's most intelligent and beautiful people, as well as renowned president-assassinator Rendle, escape to Titan to finish building their giant space ark.

Titan is renamed Andy Black 2, in memorial.

Work on the giant space ark is slower than people had hoped.

Paraguay, which had buggered off again just before the whole business with the meteor and the pole reversal and Yellowstone and the nanites, reappears and is startled by all the changes.

Osama Bin Laden is finally found, trying to order a Big Mac meal in Paraguay.

 

No one cares any more, since the US doesn't exist.

Paragquy, being the one that no one invited to the party, is named Andy Black 3 in memorium.

Andy Black 3 renames itself Paraguay :( 

Parakeets, unsure whether they have been named after a country or not, decide that they've had enough and form a political party dedicated to fighting the war against television. Nothing comes of it, though.

Paraplegics get up in stumps about the fact no one has named a country after them. No one notices.

Paratroopers are sent to fight the paraplegics on the previously neutral grounds of Paraguay, and are defeated as the parakeets decide to ally with the paraplegics to form the Paralliance.

Deriviative humorous posts about words which start with "para" are outlawed. Violators are punished by stoning. The giant space ark finally launches and heads for Alpha Centauri; The Romans win with 110%.